Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Penny, undiagnosed bio

I don't know where to begin... I was just recently suspected of having Cushing's. I go to Vanderbilt in Nashville, tn. in Jan. to have more tests run.

My Cushing's I suspect was from an overdose of Kenalog (a steroid) given to me by a Pain Clinic doctor. I was getting monthly injections for a pinched nerve in my lower back and a bulging disk in my neck. After a couple of treatments I began to notice all these symptoms, 1st weight gain, I have a Moon face, the hump on the back of my neck and I look 12 months pregnant. I am losing my hair, I have terrible stretch marks on my breast, stomach, arms, inner knees and upper legs (I am 48 yrs old and I have never had stretch marks even when I was 9 mos.pregnant in 1981), and I have high cholesterol even with medication, high blood pressure that is not controlled with 3 medications. I tried to tell my reg. doctor about these symptoms and after blood test showed my hormones were normal I just lost it and was crying trying to get him to believe me and ask him if he thought I was crazy.

My skin looks very saggy and old and bruises easily, I have to constantly pluck the man hair off my face and I have given up on wearing make-up or fixing my hair because of the sweating and my hair loss. I breakdown a lot crying uncontrollably and everything makes me sad. I have no patience’s and I am very irritable, short tempered and I have become a hermit. I try not to leave the house. I don't want anybody to see me & I don't want to see anyone. If I happen to see someone I know they don't even recognized me or they don't even see me. I just want to be left alone I don't even want to talk on the phone.

My tail bone hurts so bad that I can only sit up for short periods of time. I cannot enjoy my grandchildren and all I say is that Nana doesn’t feel good, they don’t understand because we use to do everything together now all I can do is lay around all of the time. I am so fatigued it is tiring just to go to the bathroom and bathe. I get so restless and the pain never stops so I just cry.

These symptoms are on top of and combined with all my other illnesses and medical conditions. In 1998 I had my first migraine; it lasted 7 days I wanted to DIE. A few years later dealing with the migraines, I had carpal tunnel surgery (both wrist), 1 shoulder surgery, a hysterectomy due to endometreosis, and I became depressed with anxiety, & panic attacks. I already knew I had arthritis (knees, elbows, wrists, hands, hips, shoulders) bursitis (hips), tendonitis, embarrassing sweating, RLS, IBS, Fibromyalgia, muscle tremors, loss of concentration, memory loss. It took a trip to the ER with my lower back and several years before I could get my doctor to get a MRI and x-rays to show that I had degenerative disk & bone disease. Plus I have to deal with the side effects of all the medicine I am taking. I am constantly in a state of pain, it NEVER EVER goes away, Right now my back & shoulders are killing me after just a few minutes at the computer my shoulders & neck began to draw from muscle cramps and knots, tomorrow it may be my hips, legs, hands, and feet it never stops. I keep my heating pad on at all times.

The past few months I have had pain meds to help though not much, before that it was 2003 when I had pain meds last. I could not get my doctor to give me any pain meds yet he would send me to a pain clinic to get them. I am up all hours of the night and don't sleep well at all or I sleep a lot.

I can't get anyone to believe that something is wrong with me. I finally saw an Endocrinologist in July and I now have to wait until Jan. to give the steroids time to get out of my system. Do they ever leave your system? The doctor at the pain clinic refused to take any responsibility for her mistake. She will not even tell me exactly what she injected me with or how much and at first refused to give me a copy of my medical records.

Then I had emotional stuff I was going thru at that time. People may think that hearing about your personal life has nothing to do with it but they are sooooooooooo wrong. You mental health suffers along with your physical health. I had just divorced and got mixed up with a very bitchy, narcissistic man, he thought he knew everything and we had a very distrustful, stressful relationship (a BITCH EX_WIFE and daughter didn't help any) I moved in and out several times and stupidly thought it would be different each time. The 1st time I suspected him of cheating I became OBSESSED with catching him. I became so messed up I thought I couldn't live with out him. My heart would sink in my chest 1000 times a day with anxiety and dread. He always tried to lie his way out and I learned to look at him and know when he was lying. I finally had enough and moved out for good.

During all of this my 19 yr. old daughter became pregnant; I became a grandmother before I turned 40 yrs. old, she and the baby's father were having problems and he left her a few weeks before the baby got here but came to his senses later. Then when Jackson was 3 she again became pregnant and was trying to go to college I tried to help all I could but my boyfriend didn’t want me to spend any time with anyone other than himself then I became distant from my family for approx. 9 yrs.

I feel like no one believes me and everyone thinks that I am crazy and lazy. Can the doctor be held responsible for giving me too much steroids? I was taking HRT and Nasacort but my reg. dr. said the steroids in those meds were not enough to cause Cushings. I had some steroids when I had my surgeries but that was 5 yrs ago.

Thanks for reading my story. I’m sure I left things out. I’ll try to write more later.

Thanks for reading my bio.

Penny

Labels: , ,